laundry

It's been three months

And it's still always an event doing laundry here

As much as I try
Each time something goes wrong

Jeans shrunk

A favorite sweatshirt turned pink

Trying the delicate setting
In hopes that it'll show favor

Not knowing that setting it to delicate

Would make hang drying impossible
Flooding the house with a surplus of puddles 

And putting these overly soggy clothes in the dryer 

Would make the whole kitchen steam up
'Cause the dryer seems to want to set the whole load on fire

Or realizing that after 30 minutes

Eggs were still not frying

Because who would have thought

I would have needed to turn on the main oven switch
before I turn on any stovetop

Or when I try to make chocolate chip cookies

Craving something from home

I realized that in Europe they measure things differently

And that converting the recipe from cups to grams can make for some

Real buttering thin burnt crisps

Real life stories
The differences here may be subtle
But the learning curve is growing

A couple weeks ago

I went with a team from OM

To help with a school program

For high school students

In hopes of sharing with them truth

One group in the morning
Another in the afternoon

13 and 14 years old
120 students

In the morning

I led a small group of 12 kids

So hyper

Asking so many questions

We played some games, had some talks
Aimed to be real, aimed to love

Pulled out my Bible to look up some verses

"Is that your Bible?"

Their faces were confused

They couldn’t believe that I had my own
With my name on it

That I dared to write in it

Because in their context, a Bible is only for the priest

It's hard to think that most of these students have never even held a Bible before

These students are not Americans
Or Canadians
These students are Irish
Coming from a different context
Get rid of the assumptions, Ell

The students took turns looking up different verses

Reading them out loud

It is a slow process 

But to have them read God’s words themselves

So cool

Trying to explain what it all means

Realizing that this was literally an open door
To share the gospel with these kids

God thank you

For some they don’t care

They’d rather know what Irish words I know

Or if I know how to play Gaelic football

Others sadly just leave

But there are some that just look at you like

what you’re telling them is everything

God only You know

You care about these kids more than anyone

This same day

Sharing my testimony with the whole group

I never thought that one day 

I’d be talking about my dad’s death

with 120 Irish high schoolers

In hopes of sharing with them

That even when life is in the pits

And it doesn’t make sense

Hope still remains

Seeing purpose in pain

I don’t know what’s going to happen with these students

But we need to be praying for them

So cool to see how there are opportunities to go to these schools
And these opportunities are multiplying

It's eye-opening and heart breaking

The more I learn about Ireland

Realizing how much I don’t know

Moving to a country

Where on the outside
They may look like me
Dress like me and

Speak English like me

But the inside is a different story

Trying to wrap my head around the fact that

When I look at the people around me

98.5% wouldn't know the real Jesus

But what if they knew that this man Jesus
Already made it possible to be right with God?

That His sacrifice was sufficient once and for all?

That no matter how much we try and try

Going to Mass
Going to confession
Is not what saves?

But only by faith

Through God’s grace?

There
Is
Freedom
For
You

Month three
Still battling their washing machines and ovens
Still learning the hearts of the Irish

It's been a process
But I think my heart is slowly finding its way here

Thank you for everything
I miss you all
Until next time,
Ell

⇿⇿⇿

Love these people

Sharing my story with the students 

Trying out some hurling

Something about west coasts

Seeing that there's more than just green hills  

Thanks for the day 

When the guys from operation needed help painting 

2am and still watching the Super Bowl  

Thanks for stopping by, Raph

Ever wondered where your hair ties disappeared to...

Write to you soon ♡

It is profoundly humbling, humiliating even, to stand before the cross of Christ and be forced to admit: “There is nothing I can say, nothing I can do, nothing I can put forward in my own defense. All I have in my hand to offer are my sins. 'Oh God, please forgive me.’ The strange thing is, though, that this moment of base humility at the cross is also the moment of great joy. When you realize that your salvation is accomplished not by anything that you or any other human can do or contribute, but only through Chris’s infinitely worthy sacrifice, made once for all, there is peace and assurance and comfort like no other. The weight of a lifetime’s sin falls from your shoulders and lands at the foot of the cross, and you realize that Jesus meant when he said: 

'It is finished'

- Ray Galea, Nothing in my Hand I Bring

where you have me

Christmas season in Ireland
So many caroling invites and

Town lighting celebrations

Choir concerts with Irish uillean pipes

Happy Christmas, everyone

But this Christmas

Something  unexpected came up

I was invited to spend to the holidays with Raphi’s family in Austria

Everyone here is off for two weeks

Looks like I'm going to Austria

Holiday break started

And I hopped on a plane

To head to the country I thought was going to be home

I didn’t realize how much I missed the mountains

Until I was surrounded by these old friends

Spending time with Raphi

Spending time with his family

I am so thankful that this could happen

To be with these people

To have time to think

But this weird dynamic was there

When we walked the city streets

of where I would have lived

If I had interned there

Seeing faces I could have known

Listening to that constant German tone

Needed to let go

A time to say goodbye

Thank you God

Flying back to Ireland in the New Year

I didn’t realize but I was flying back "home"

I don't know how to explain it

but after having that time away

and coming back to this green country

I'm slowly feeling more like

this is where I need to be

This is where I’m living

This is where I’m staying 

After visiting the refugees last week

I was talking with my Canadian friend Michelle

Listening to more of her story

Her heart

How she prays for these Syrians

Cries even

God, convict my heart like that

I told her that I don’t know why I’m here

Or what I can do

But if there’s anyway I can help 

with the refugees or anything, I’m here

She looked at me and told me 

of how she was worried that when her good friend left

she wouldn’t have anyone to go visit the refugees with

“We were praying that someone would come with me

who had a heart for the people and actually wanted to be there.

And then, here you are."

My gut dropped

I didn't know how to respond

God, the way you orchestrate everything

I don't get it

The timing of it all

Wanting to start in August

Wanting to be in Austria

But here I was

at this place

at this time

And she said that she was praying for someone to come

God, only You know

I’m seeing a growing desire to be here

Challenged to not just go with it

Inspired to not let this year pass me by

Be

Invested

Involved

Intentional

To know and believe that

No matter what

God is at work

Administrative assistant

Hospitality

School programmes

Street evangelism

Refugee ministry

God, thank you for this

The journey continues

Here I'll remain 
where you have me

_______________________________________

This blew me away

Before we left for holiday

I was saying goodbye to some of the refugees

I made friends with a man there named

Abdullah

Outgoing and full of life

Wasn’t sure if he was going to be there

when I would come back in two weeks

so I asked him, “Will you be here in January?” 

He replied, “I don’t know, why?”

The thought that I may not see him again or a least for a while

kinda bummed me out

“Why are you so sad?” he asked

“I don’t know, I just don't know when I’ll see you again.” 

He smiled and looked at me, "You know, you just cry in your heart, and just keep your smile on your face”

Where is this coming from Abdullah

An OM friend standing next to me said to him, "Abdullah, it's okay to show that you’re sad. That means a lot to people when they see that you're sad when you say goodbye.”

He shook his head, but still smiling

“No, no…after you’ve seen the blood of your own family right before you, you don’t cry anymore. You just cry in your heart.”

His eyes were deep

My friend tried again, asking him more questions

but Abdullah just shook his head and said, “After you’ve seen the blood of your family…”

He said he had to go and he waved goodbye as he walked away

He still kept that smile on his face

but his eyes were deep

Heavy

A window to his heart

A glimpse of the pain

There's so much to his past

What do I know

To know their stories

To love them through it

For opportunity to know them more

Opportunities to point them to Hope

To Grace

To You

Boldness to speak it

Love to demonstrate it

Not just for the Syrians

But for the Irish

Not just for the Irish

But for the lost

God, break my heart for these people

If you want to know more of Abdullah's story

feel free to check out his documentary:

"Through Abdullah's Eyes"

Thank you for all your encouragement and prayers

Two months in
Unto the next

Who knows what these next months will bring

Thanks for running this race with me

All for Him

Viel Liebe,

Ell

⇿⇿⇿

Hearing the Irish uillean pipes live has changed Christmas forever

Christmas time in Dublin

If only these lights were up the whole year

Welcome to Austria

"Sugared in"

655 coat of arms painted in the Grosser Wappensaal

A day on the slopes 

Thanks for the times, Raph

Back in Athlone, Ireland

Sean's Bar - known for being the oldest pub in Ireland

One housemate is from the Netherlands and the other from South Korea
Love these people so much

Hanging out at the hotel with some OMers and refugees

Thanks for everything
Everyone

"If it pleases my Lord, and only by Your grace / Use my life 'til it's poured out for Your sake / Until then I'll remain where You have me / With joy when I feel unhappy / And the peace that surpasses all my understanding / My life is in the hands of Your love everlasting"

Beautiful Eulogy, Beautiful Eulogy

in between two chairs

Ireland

Here I am

Here you are

Is this all real?

Forever rolling green hills 

Forever supply of grazing sheep

Forever beautiful accents

Cold rain

Cloudy days

Sacred and sparse

Sunny days

It’s beautiful

To see this part of the world

Green upon green

Narrow, winding roads

Buildings older than my home country

It still hasn't clicked yet that this will be home

for the next 8 months

I have now become a part of a team

Who is passionate about seeing the church grow

In a land less with than 1.5% Evangelical Christian

Reaching the unreached 

This team has gathered from all around the world-

Germany, Korea, Switzerland

France, Brazil, The Netherlands

Australia, Ireland, Canada

America

(Who would have thought I'd serve with another girl from Wisconsin)

 This team has a culture of it’s own

all together for one purpose

So here I am

Learning to wear a few different hats

Administrative assistant and hospitality

Helping out the office in any way that I can

Feel free to call the office and 

you'll most likely be greeted by my voice, 

"Hello, this is OM Ireland. How can I help you?"

Joining different teams for different outreaches

like going to schools and doing gospel presentations

with students who may have never touched a Bible before

Or joining the Big Red Bus team and doing street ministry

offering free coffee and tea on the bus as a way 

to build relationships with locals

in hopes of pointing them to 

Christ

One other thing I've been able to be a part of

is something I didn't expect

Once a week I join a family from

Abbotsford, BC (crazy, I know)

 and we go to a hotel

where about 200 Syrian refugees live

Drinking cup after cup of tea,

we just go to hang out and see how they're doing,

helping them practice English, trying to learn Arabic from them,

listening to their stories,

crazy, crazy stories

Realizing how much of this world I don't know about

 I've really enjoyed getting to know them

I have no clue what all will come of this

but I'm so thankful for this opportunity

Through all this

I feel like I've only seen a glimpse 

of this need for the Gospel 

to be presented and lived out

 to a nation where people are 

constantly trying to do the best they can

hoping for the mercy of God

believing that works is what saves 

when really it's only by grace 

O Ireland, look at Jesus.

I'm being stretched to serve

In ways I’ve never done before

Stretched to not be ashamed

Stretched to be bold

Stretched to trust

It's only the beginning

Even though it's been a very cool experience so far, 

I need to be honest with you, 

I still don't feel as though my heart has followed me here yet

I want it to

I need it to

But I can’t deny that there are still days when

I still feel lost

and confused

as to why I’m here

I learned a french saying since being here:

être assis entre deux chaises

Translated it means "to be sitting between two chairs"

To feel both good and bad about something

Torn

In between two chairs

And that's only how I can explain this mixed feeling

I'm thankful for this time

I'm excited to see what God is going to do

I pray that I will be open and available

to be used in ways that God wants

but I don't know what it'll take

in order for my heart to take the next plane

and catch up with me here

I guess we'll see what is to come

Thank you for being a part of this

Thank you for you prayers

Through it all, we can trust that He is still good and He still reigns

All for Him,

Ell

⇿⇿⇿

First day helping out with the Big Red Bus ministry in Athlone.

I'm thinking of creating a photo album of just the Irish doors. Why not.

It's a dream that one day I'll be able to get a selfie with a sheep.
One day. 

Walking the streets of Galway.

I'm glad to see that Ireland loves Canada, too.

It's beautiful and dark all at the same time. 

This bookstore in Galway was filled, absolutely filled, with books.
I found out that bookstores have a way of making you feel at home. 

Took a pit stop at the smallest chapel in Ireland.
A husband built this for his deceased wife to demonstrate his love for her.
I guess he set the standard high.

Wisconsin came to visit.

Trying to sing carols.

Still trying to sing carols.

For some of the kids in the neighborhood, this was only their second time where it snowed enough for them to make a snowman. 

They still can make better ones than I can.

“Indeed, God is not abandoning the city. In spite of moral and spiritual decay and socio-economic deterioration, in spite of every prophet of doom’s statement that the city’s sickness is unto death, the church must believe that even if there is spiritual, moral and economic death in the city, our God is able to speak life into it and call for resurrection in the city”

-George McKinney, No Stranger in the City, 38

Amen and amen.