until next time

OM Ireland, thanks a million.

Sitting here in Green Bay, Wisconsin

It’s hard to believe that it’s all over

There’s still a part of me that thinks

That in a few days 

I’ll be taking a plane back to Ireland

And continue life there

But the longer I stay here

The more it's slowly sinking in

That I’m not going back

At least for a while

The time has come and gone 

A year that involved so much

Planning and waiting

Emails and embassy visits

Visa issues and placement changes

Thinking back to when I thought I would be in Austria

“God, I’ll walk through this door until you close it”

Then a week before I was supposed to go

He closed that door

A dream crushed

Facing confusion

Grief

Uncertainty

Time was running out

Needing to remember that my life is not my own

All the while 

He had a different door

For a place that never crossed my mind

Ireland

And here we are

8 months later

And how it's gripped my heart

Last Sunday at church.

Looking back it's crazy to see how God provided and worked

In a place I had no idea what to expect

Learning things like how office life is still essential for ministry

At first having a hard time wrapping my mind around the fact 

That my main role would be the administrative assistant in OM Ireland’s office

That normally wouldn’t be a job that I would sign up for 

But seeing as that’s the position they needed filled

I tried filling in that role the best I could

Aware that I would need a lot of help and a lot of grace

In doing something I wasn’t strong in or passionate about 

It sounds lame but I struggled

Sitting at a desk all day 

Answering emails, transferring calls

Paying motor taxes, scheduling devotions

Getting wrapped up into the office routine

Feeling discouraged because of not

Being out there where the people are

But as time went on and my perspective grew

I began to see how all this is necessary

In order for the ministry to keep going

The fine details if overlooked

Can cause issues that will hinder 

Instead of helping people thrive

A stretch in abilities

A change in perspective

A call to be faithful

Even in the little things

It’s all for Him anyway

A favorite view from my desk at the office.

But also realizing that no matter what job we have

The call is still there to make disciples

Convicted that even if my ministry for this internship is to do office work, 

I still need to be intentional about 

Being in the community and building relationships

Can be harder than it sounds

But as the year went on

I was amazed and humbled at how 

There were so many times

So many days

When I didn’t know what would happen

But the challenge was there to just show up and be available

Praying that God would provide opportunities 

To meet and talk with people 

Most of the time when we went to 

Ballaghaderreen to visit refugees

We had no clue who we’d meet or 

What would happen

But God always provided people

Always

It was so crazy

In this Syrian world in the middle of Ireland

Seeing relationships strengthen and conversations deepen

Conversations about life

Leading to conversations about the Gospel 

Leaving the hotel in awe 

Of how only God could have orchestrated that time

After dinner with some of the Syrian guys

I wish I could put into words all that happened

but even in just 8 months

I think life has changed

I never would have thought I'd end up there

but God has a much bigger picture in mind

"You can make plans but God directs your steps"

Needing to trust with open hands

Persevere in the midst of fear

God does provide

And God is faithful

One thing I still can't get over is meeting the Irish woman 

Who also lost her dad

The journey it's been with her

The spiritual battle it's been with her

But in this

Seeing how

God uses your story

There were times when I was struggling this year 

With the loss of my own dad

Questioning the pain

Then I'd get a phone call from her and she'd say,

"I know I can talk to you because you understand."

Wow

Seeing God use this loss for His glory

Across the world

It doesn't minimize the pain

But it somehow gives a purpose to the pain 

It's hard for me to understand

But it brings me to tears

Because it's literally and personally

Watching God make beauty from ashes

I'm thankful I was able to meet her with before I left

And praise God, she's willing to get connected with other Christians in Dublin

But please keep praying for her

One last thing before I sign off

But this picture above

Is one that I hope to never forget

Before I left for this internship 

And was in the middle of all the chaos

Of not knowing where I'd end up or what I'd do

A verse kept popping up 

Time after time

In the bitterness of all the changes, 

I wanted to believe what the verse promised

But I had a hard time letting it sink in

Dramatic as it sounds

But when I flew across the ocean

Into what I only knew as the unknown

I walked into my room for the first time 

And there hanging on the wall all by itself

Was a cross with that same verse on it:

"The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me, 

Your steadfast love, O LORD, endures forever.

Do not forsake the work of your hands."

Psalm 138:8

My heart sunk to my gut

I still don't know why plans happened they way they did

But I don't need to know

What I do need to know 

Is that God is good

And I belong to Him

It's about Him

Always has been

Always will be

In the next few weeks
I'll be heading back to British Columbia
For my last year at Columbia Bible College

The adventure continues as
I'll be a Resident Leader
For group of college ladies in my dorm

If you could be praying
For the wisdom and grace to lead in a Christ-like way
And the love and strength to build relationships and community
As well as for the transition back to life in this part of the world

That would be amazing

I can't thank you enough for journeying along with me in this
All a part of something bigger
But from the bottom to my heart

Thank you

May we keep trusting in Him

Until next time,

Ell ♡

⇿⇿⇿

Impact Ireland - short-term outreach with so much enthusiasm. 

The hotel in Ballaghaderreen where the refugees live as they wait for housing. 

Syrian coffee.
Probably the strongest cups of coffee I've ever had.
But I'd take it any day.  

Last time with the whole gang.

Haima lived in the hotel for about 1.5 years.
But she finally got a place and it was so cool being able to visit her in her new home. 

Being responsible for the post was always a party.
Thanks for all always asking me about my day, Mike the postman.

Colm helping out with worship with his Irish bodhrán. 

Stopped in Washington & British Columbia on the way home

So incredibly thankful I was able to be in BC for Bek's wedding.
Love you! 

Also so thankful for his family. 
First met them Ireland but they are originally from the same city where I go to school in Canada. 
Crazy how small this world is. 

And now back home in Green Bay. 

I've had plans / shattered and broken / things I have hoped in / fall through my hands /
You have plans / to redeem and restore me / You're behind and before me / oh, help me believe

God, You don't need me / but somehow You want me / oh, how You love me /
Somehow that frees me / to take my hands off of my life / and the way it should go

...To open my hands up / and give You control

Tenth Avenue North - "Control"