where you have me

Christmas season in Ireland
So many caroling invites and

Town lighting celebrations

Choir concerts with Irish uillean pipes

Happy Christmas, everyone

But this Christmas

Something  unexpected came up

I was invited to spend to the holidays with Raphi’s family in Austria

Everyone here is off for two weeks

Looks like I'm going to Austria

Holiday break started

And I hopped on a plane

To head to the country I thought was going to be home

I didn’t realize how much I missed the mountains

Until I was surrounded by these old friends

Spending time with Raphi

Spending time with his family

I am so thankful that this could happen

To be with these people

To have time to think

But this weird dynamic was there

When we walked the city streets

of where I would have lived

If I had interned there

Seeing faces I could have known

Listening to that constant German tone

Needed to let go

A time to say goodbye

Thank you God

Flying back to Ireland in the New Year

I didn’t realize but I was flying back "home"

I don't know how to explain it

but after having that time away

and coming back to this green country

I'm slowly feeling more like

this is where I need to be

This is where I’m living

This is where I’m staying 

After visiting the refugees last week

I was talking with my Canadian friend Michelle

Listening to more of her story

Her heart

How she prays for these Syrians

Cries even

God, convict my heart like that

I told her that I don’t know why I’m here

Or what I can do

But if there’s anyway I can help 

with the refugees or anything, I’m here

She looked at me and told me 

of how she was worried that when her good friend left

she wouldn’t have anyone to go visit the refugees with

“We were praying that someone would come with me

who had a heart for the people and actually wanted to be there.

And then, here you are."

My gut dropped

I didn't know how to respond

God, the way you orchestrate everything

I don't get it

The timing of it all

Wanting to start in August

Wanting to be in Austria

But here I was

at this place

at this time

And she said that she was praying for someone to come

God, only You know

I’m seeing a growing desire to be here

Challenged to not just go with it

Inspired to not let this year pass me by

Be

Invested

Involved

Intentional

To know and believe that

No matter what

God is at work

Administrative assistant

Hospitality

School programmes

Street evangelism

Refugee ministry

God, thank you for this

The journey continues

Here I'll remain 
where you have me

_______________________________________

This blew me away

Before we left for holiday

I was saying goodbye to some of the refugees

I made friends with a man there named

Abdullah

Outgoing and full of life

Wasn’t sure if he was going to be there

when I would come back in two weeks

so I asked him, “Will you be here in January?” 

He replied, “I don’t know, why?”

The thought that I may not see him again or a least for a while

kinda bummed me out

“Why are you so sad?” he asked

“I don’t know, I just don't know when I’ll see you again.” 

He smiled and looked at me, "You know, you just cry in your heart, and just keep your smile on your face”

Where is this coming from Abdullah

An OM friend standing next to me said to him, "Abdullah, it's okay to show that you’re sad. That means a lot to people when they see that you're sad when you say goodbye.”

He shook his head, but still smiling

“No, no…after you’ve seen the blood of your own family right before you, you don’t cry anymore. You just cry in your heart.”

His eyes were deep

My friend tried again, asking him more questions

but Abdullah just shook his head and said, “After you’ve seen the blood of your family…”

He said he had to go and he waved goodbye as he walked away

He still kept that smile on his face

but his eyes were deep

Heavy

A window to his heart

A glimpse of the pain

There's so much to his past

What do I know

To know their stories

To love them through it

For opportunity to know them more

Opportunities to point them to Hope

To Grace

To You

Boldness to speak it

Love to demonstrate it

Not just for the Syrians

But for the Irish

Not just for the Irish

But for the lost

God, break my heart for these people

If you want to know more of Abdullah's story

feel free to check out his documentary:

"Through Abdullah's Eyes"

Thank you for all your encouragement and prayers

Two months in
Unto the next

Who knows what these next months will bring

Thanks for running this race with me

All for Him

Viel Liebe,

Ell

⇿⇿⇿

Hearing the Irish uillean pipes live has changed Christmas forever

Christmas time in Dublin

If only these lights were up the whole year

Welcome to Austria

"Sugared in"

655 coat of arms painted in the Grosser Wappensaal

A day on the slopes 

Thanks for the times, Raph

Back in Athlone, Ireland

Sean's Bar - known for being the oldest pub in Ireland

One housemate is from the Netherlands and the other from South Korea
Love these people so much

Hanging out at the hotel with some OMers and refugees

Thanks for everything
Everyone

"If it pleases my Lord, and only by Your grace / Use my life 'til it's poured out for Your sake / Until then I'll remain where You have me / With joy when I feel unhappy / And the peace that surpasses all my understanding / My life is in the hands of Your love everlasting"

Beautiful Eulogy, Beautiful Eulogy